Friday 17 November 2017

Zimbabwe's bizarre coup

Well, this has got to be the strangest coup of all time. Mugabe ousted, military chiefs take over, tanks on the streets, the old dictator forced into house arrest (very nice house, mind you), and then, suddenly up pops Robert M in his finest suit attending a college graduation as if he was still the president and nothing had happened. All very bizarre and kind of creepy. The military I'm sure never left his side throughout the ceremony, but Mugabe seemed quite happy. I noticed that the day before, he was reported to have "chuckled" during a meeting with the miitary top bods and visiting South African delegates. You don't generally chuckle before your execution, so I guess there's not going to be any Mugabe blood shed. Nothing like the moment when Colonel Gaddafi was overthrown for example when he was summarily lynched. So, all very pleasant in Harare at this stage. But Mugabe must have got the message surely? The man called Crocodile is beathing down his neck and at some point he will have to step aside and spend the rest of his days looking at his medals, presumably without his beloved wife, Grace, who seems unlikely to be able to make a triumphant return. Mr Crocodile will see to that. When he takes over, assuming he does and not the poor long-suffering Opposition leader, Morgan Tsvangirai, old Crocodile is not going to want Mugabe wandering the streets looking for trouble, let alone Grace, his hated rival. But in the meantime, perhaps Mugabe has a few other longstanding engagements which he would like to fulfil during this strange hiatus, such as opening a new school that hasn't actually been built or visiting a tractor factory. Does Zimbabwe have tractor factories? Probably not. The house "sort of arrest" of old Mugabe mirrors the bizarre arrests that have taken place in Saudi Arabia courtesy of the new Crown Prince. A whole host of princes, government ministers, officials and members of the military detained for questioning in the Crown Prince's huge corruption investigation are not chained to the walls of a dungeon but have been housed in the five-star luxury Ritz-Carlton Hotel in Riyadh where room service is legendary. So the wealthy Saudi princes, including one of the richest men on the planet, billionaire Prince Alwaleed bin Talal Al Saud, share one thing in common with Robert Mugabe. They have all been ousted one way or the other but they are still enjoying the sort of standard of living to which they have for long been accustomed. But, despite Mugabe's little visit to the graduation ceremony, none of them are free men. Their future will depend, on the one hand, on the whim of The Crocodile, and on the other, the very smooth and very rich Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman. Mugabe might wish he was currently living at the Ritz-Carlton in Riyadh.

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