Boris - tell all, then get on with PM campaigning

Most of the world now knows that Boris Johnson who wants to be Winston Churchill had a huge and rather explosive row with his girlfriend at her flat in London on Thursday night and that the words of anger were recorded by a neighbour who rang the police and then passed the tape onto the Guardian newspaper. Basically since then Boris has refused to comment on what happened, whether he still loves his girlfriend and whether he feels any sort of remorse. Usually I would say, this is a private matter, no one got hurt and these sort of domestic bust-ups happen up and down the country every night. But this is Boris! He wants to be prime minister and he of all people should tell his many supporters why he had such a row and what the hell it was about. I think he has been very badly advised. Someone in his camp has obviously said, "The best thing, Boris, is to keep your mouth shut on this one occasion and hope it goes away." But again I say, this is Boris not some boring nobody Tory MP whose private life is of no interest to anyone. If I was his adviser I would say, "Look, Boris, here is your script. Stick to it: Hello everyone, I just want to say that my girlfriend and I had a bit of a tiff the other night and it got quite noisy. I apologise to her, to the neghbours and to anyone who feels this makes me look an arse. But, come on, you have all had disagreements in your personal relationships, right? This was no big deal. We were rowing because of the stress of campaigning to be your next prime minister. We have made up and everything is fine. I'm particularly sorry for the neighour who felt it necessary to record our tiff and call the police. I'll buy him a pint and make friends. So, please, I would be very grateful if you could accept my apology and statement and now let it be. There are many more important things to worry about and to deal with in this beloved country of ours. So that's it. OK?" Would that work? Well it would have worked on Day One but it's aleady Day Three of The Big Row story. It may be too late but you should give it a try, Boris. Ignore your other advisers and take my advice. Come clean, and by the way, comb your hair before you do.